Forgiven, Yet Still Haunted: Healing from the Weight of Sin

Hope For Those Crushed Under the Weight of Past Sin

Scripture reference: Psalm 32:5 – Micah 7:18-19

“I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and you forgave the iniquity of my sin.” Selah.

“Who is a God like you, who pardons sin and forgives the transgression of the remnant of his inheritance? You do not stay angry forever but delight to show mercy. You will again have compassion on us; you will tread our sins underfoot and hurl all our iniquities into the depths of the sea.”

🔥 Introduction: When Forgiveness Feels Out of Reach

Guilt can cling to the soul like shackles to the feet of a prisoner. You may believe God forgives, yet still lie awake at night tormented by a past you can’t undo. For many behind bars, it’s not just the crime that holds them—it’s the crushing, continual feeling that forgiveness is out of reach.

One woman, incarcerated for over 20 years in a federal medical facility, put it this way: “I feel like I’m unforgivable. I begged God, but I still feel like He left me. Can I still be saved after turning my back on Him?”

This devotional is for the ones still carrying the weight of regret. It’s not easy. The feelings are real. But so is the mercy of God. And today, we face those haunting doubts head-on. Whether you feel forgiven or not, we’ll open the Word of God together and find out what He says about your past, your pain, and His promise.

💔 Did God Forgive Me If I Don’t Feel Forgiven?

Let’s be honest. Sometimes the heaviest burdens in life aren’t the visible ones—they’re the quiet, inner doubts that whisper, “You’re not really forgiven.” And when feelings of guilt drown out the voice of truth, even sincere believers start wondering: Have I been cast off forever?

But here’s the truth: Forgiveness is not based on your feelings. It’s based on God’s promise.

Romans 5:8 reminds us, “But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” Jesus didn’t wait until we felt worthy—He died while we were still in rebellion.

And in 1 John 1:9 we are told, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” Not some unrighteousness. All.

You may feel like your sin is too big to forgive, but Jesus’ blood is bigger. God’s mercy outweighs your worst mistake.

🚫 The Unpardonable Sin: Have I Gone Too Far?

Many fear they’ve committed the one sin God can’t forgive—blaspheming the Holy Spirit. But what exactly is that sin?

Jesus said, “All sins will be forgiven the sons of men, and whatever blasphemies they utter; but whoever blasphemes against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness…” (Mark 3:28–29).

What does this mean?

The blasphemy of the Holy Spirit isn’t just a single bad word or act—it’s a hardened, final, lifelong rejection of Jesus and the Spirit’s call to repentance. If you’re worried you’ve committed it, that’s proof you haven’t.

A heart that wants forgiveness and feels sorrow over sin is still soft—and God is still at work in you.

🌊 Buried in the Depths: What God Does With Your Sin

God doesn’t just forgive. He forgets:

● Micah 7:19 — “He will subdue our iniquities; and thou wilt cast all their sins into the depths of the sea.”

● Psalm 103:12 — “As far as the east is from the west, so far hath he removed our transgressions from us.”

● Isaiah 43:25 — “I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins.”

God doesn’t forgive reluctantly. He forgives completely.

When Jesus died, He didn’t say “almost finished.” He said, “It is FINISHED” (John 19:30).

That means your debt is paid in full—not partially, not temporarily, but eternally. God doesn’t keep a list of your wrongs pinned to the wall of heaven. He tore it up, nailed it to the cross, and declared you clean.

It’s not that God has spiritual amnesia—it’s that He has made a sovereign choice to never hold your sin against you again. What love is this, that the Judge of all the earth would erase your criminal record and adopt you into His family?

If God has buried your sin in the sea, why do you keep diving in to dig it back up? Stop revisiting what He has already removed. Live like someone who is washed, not someone who is still wallowing.

The enemy wants you focused on your past. But Jesus calls you into your future—free, forgiven, and fully His.


🛐 Spurning and Returning: Can I Come Back After Walking Away?

This is what breaks hearts in prison. “I once knew Him, but I turned away. I told Him to leave me alone. How could He take me back now?”

Yet we see God’s heart in Jeremiah 3:

“Return, faithless Israel… I will not look on you in anger, for I am merciful.” (Jeremiah 3:12)

You were faithless, but He is faithful.

Even Peter denied Jesus—not once, but three times—and yet the Lord restored him. Paul murdered Christians, and God made him an apostle. God’s mercy is for the worst of us. Especially the worst of us.

Romans 10:13: “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”

🔗 For Those Behind Bars: What Forgiveness Means in Prison

Prisoners often wrestle with a deeper level of guilt. The consequences of their sins are visible, tangible, and long-lasting. It’s one thing to be forgiven—but it’s another to live each day surrounded by reminders of the past. But forgiveness in Christ is not a feeling—it’s a fact.

● Your sins may have led to prison, but they no longer lead to hell.

● You may wear prison clothes, but Christ clothes you in righteousness.

● The world may see a criminal, but God sees His child.

You are not the sum of your crimes. You are the sum of Christ’s sacrifice.

The enemy would love to keep you chained in regret. But Jesus came to set captives free—yes, even those with life sentences. He opened the prison doors of your soul the moment you believed.

🔗 Final Thought: Grace Isn’t Earned—It’s GIVEN

You may struggle to feel forgiven, but rest in this: feeling isn’t the same as faith. Feelings rise and fall like ocean waves—but the promise of God stands unmoved. You may wake up some days feeling lost, ashamed, or unworthy, but those feelings don’t rewrite the finished work of Christ.

If you’ve come to Jesus in true repentance, you are clean. “Now YE ARE CLEAN through the word which I have spoken unto you” (John 15:3). God has declared your pardon in heaven’s courtroom, and there is no appeal.

You don’t have to beg for what Christ already bled to give. You don’t have to carry what He already carried to the cross.

Forgiveness isn’t something you achieve—it’s something you receive. It’s not a trophy for the strong, but a gift for the broken. You don’t earn it by doing better, crying harder, or waiting longer. You receive it when you fall at His feet and believe.

And even if your heart still whispers, “How can this be?”—God’s Word shouts back, “It is FINISHED.”

So walk forward. Not in guilt, but in gratitude. Not in shame, but in sonship. Grace was never about your worthiness—it was always about His.

🔁 The Other Side of Forgiveness: Extending What You’ve Received

Before we close, there’s one more truth we must not leave out: Forgiven people must become forgiving people.

It’s not optional. If you’ve tasted the mercy of God, you are now called—and empowered—to extend that mercy to others, no matter how deep the wound or long the betrayal. Jesus made this crystal clear:

“For if ye forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you:
 But if ye forgive not men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” - Matthew 6:14–15

And again:

“Be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.” — Ephesians 4:32

Harboring unforgiveness in your heart will poison your peace. It is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to suffer. No matter what someone has done to you, when you refuse to forgive, you become the prisoner.

Yes, it’s hard. Sometimes the pain is indescribable. But we don’t forgive because people deserve it—we forgive because Christ forgave us when we didn’t deserve it either.

And when you choose to forgive, you are not excusing evil—you are entrusting justice to God, and freeing your own soul from bitterness.

So ask yourself: Is there someone—inside or outside these walls—you still need to forgive? Let today be the day the chains fall off.

🧠 Reflection Questions

1. What are some reasons you doubt that you’ve been forgiven?

2. Which scriptures from this devotional spoke most clearly to your heart?

3. Have you truly repented and trusted in Christ’s sacrifice for your sins?

4. What would it look like to live as someone who is forgiven—even if you don’t always feel like it?

🙏 Final Prayer

Father,

I confess that I don’t always feel forgiven. The weight of my past still presses down on me, and sometimes I wonder if Your mercy could ever reach someone like me. But Your Word tells me that while I was still a sinner, Christ died for me. You have cast my sins into the sea. You remember them no more.

Lord, so many behind bars carry their regrets like an anchor, dragging their spirits to the bottom of despair. They walk through long corridors of memory and shame, unsure if redemption could ever reach someone like them. But You are the God who walks into prison cells and sets the captives free—from the inside out.

Father, lift every heavy heart that still fears rejection. Break the chains of shame that still bind those who cry out to You from behind locked doors. Remind every struggling prisoner—man or woman—that they are not forgotten. You have not turned Your face away. Let them know they are not defined by their record, but by Your righteousness.

Help us all believe that Your grace is deeper than our guilt. That Your mercy is greater than our mistakes. That You are not looking for perfect people, but for broken people who will trust in a perfect Savior.

Grant the gift of assurance to every soul crying out for it today. Let peace flood every anxious mind. Let hope rise up where despair has lived for too long. Let the name of Jesus echo through prison walls and bring new life, even in the darkest places.

Thank You for Jesus, for the cross, and for a love that holds us even when we fall.

In His holy and merciful name we pray, Amen!

From: Fight the Good Fight of Faith / Life Journal: by Gregg Harris